Drinks industry watchdog the Portman Group is celebrating 28 years of its Code of Practice, which sets the minimum standards for alcohol producers to market their products responsibly.
This is around seven years more than SLR has been kicking about for, and about 70 less than UTC.
The Code has resulted in nearly 200 inappropriate and irresponsible products pulled from shelves. It’s fair to say, there have been some absolute belters.
Take 1997’s Bullshit Lager. Name aside, bottles featured an image of a cartoon bull defecating. Nice.
Fast forward to 2003 and Shag Lime. The producer argued that ‘shag’ referred to the seabird on the label, which Under The Counter thought was fair enough. Luckily for public decency, the Auld Boy doesn’t sit on the Group’s Panel, which pointed out shag was also “a commonly used slang term for sexual intercourse”.
Rubbel Sexy Lager (2007) also fell foul of rules linking alcohol with sex, although as a fan of Tennent’s ‘Lager Lovelies’ back in the day, UTC failed to see what was up with using an image of a woman in a swimsuit to sell beer. However, he was shocked to discover that bored Rubbel drinkers could scratch off said swimsuit to reveal said woman in another suit entirely – her birthday one.
UTC could fill an entire magazine, never mind a single column, with tales of TNT Liquid Dynamite, Kalashnikov vodka, ‘Tommy gun’ whisky, Quickie wine, and a jelly shot called Suck & Blow, but space dictates otherwise.
Instead, he’ll just raise a glass of Rubbel to the Portman Group’s next 28 years. Then dig out a coin.
