There has long been rumour and speculation circulating around SLR Towers as to the existence of a tattoo, or indeed tattoos, on Under The Counter’s withered old frame.
The Auld Boy remains tight-lipped on the subject, preferring to cloak himself in what he calls “an air of mystery”. Surprisingly – or not if you know UTC – “air of mystery” smells just like stale tobacco smoke.
However, even if he is packing some hidden tats, Under The Counter has some way to go to rival fellow pensioner Keith Gordon. The 66-year-old, who bears the mantle of Britain’s ‘most tattooed man,’ hit the headlines recently when he was chucked out of an unnamed supermarket after an employee – who was clearly a bit needled themselves – told Keith he wasn’t welcome in the store.
The former civil servant hails from Romford and was topping up his suntan in Brighton at the time.
Amazingly, the self-styled ‘coolest looking guy in Essex’ was tattoo-free until he was 52. Now he’s covered in more ink than a Sunday newspaper, with next to no bare skin left at all.
A “shocked” Keith later complained to the supermarket in question and received a 20 quid shopping voucher for his pains.
Which, as Under The Counter pointed out, must pale into insignificance when compared to the pain of a needle penetrating your eyelids 50 times a second.
