As part of its 70th anniversary celebrations, fuel brand Jet polled 2,000 motorists to discover the UK’s favourite driving songs from the past 70 years.
It also laid its hands on a terrible stock photograph that in no way accurately reflects any family car journey that has ever been undertaken, but that’s by the by.
Now, Under The Counter loves a pointless survey, and this one was right up his ancient alley. For one thing, he knows what it’s like to be a septuagenarian – although his 70th birthday is now just a dot in the rear-view mirror.
For another, he loves driving, despite being so old that he acquired a licence by simply rocking up to the Post Office and asking for one. No test required in the days when there were more horse and cart combos on the road than cars.
He also likes music, although he’s more of a Billie Holiday man than Billie Eilish. However, he’s not fond of the song in the poll’s pole position, Bohemian Rhapsody.
Weighing in at just under six minutes, Queen’s over-the-top, cod mini opera is five minutes and 50 seconds too long for UTC. Also, start playing it and there’s a good chance he will be no longer with us when it ends. This is why you’ll never see a green banana on his desk; he’d hate to croak wasting 25p on uneaten fruit.
The Auld Boy had no time either for the tune parked at number two, Murder on the Dancefloor by Sophie Ellis-Bextor. However, he nodded approvingly to discover Ritchie Valens had driven into third place with La Bamba.
Although why anyone would pen a ditty about an Adidas training shoe was beyond him.
